juSt read This anD Then U Will be Smile...

A guy walks into a dentist's office and flops right down on the couch. 
"Doc", he says, "Here's the problem. I think I'm a moth" 
"Well", says the doctor, "That certainly is a problem, but why did you come into a dentist's office?" 
"The light was on."

 

There was a German, an American and a Blonde.
The German said he was the first on Mars.
The American said he was the first on the moon.
The blonde said she would be the first one on the sun. The German and the American laughed. "How are you gonna do that?!" they asked.
The Blond smiled and said "I have a secret... I'll go at night."

 

A sweet old lady telephoned St. Joseph's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?" The operator said, "I can, what's the name and room number?"
The old laday in her weak voice said, "Norma Findlay, Room 302."
The operator replied, "Let me place you on hold while I check with her nurse."
After a few minutes the operator returned to the phone and said, "Oh, I have good news, her nurse just told me that Norma is doing very well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back as normal and her physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged on Tuesday."
The old lady said, "Thank you. That's wonderful! I was so worried! God bless you!"
The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?"
The grandmother said, "No, I'm Norma Findlay in 302. No one tells me shit."